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  • Writer's picturekelly mccready

Growing Old Disgracefully

The beauty of a woman, with passing years only grows!' Audrey Hepburn Ageing is something that is beautiful, and let me be honest getting older beats the alternative of not getting older! This being said 'growing old gracefully' is a term I have always found issue with so I thought I would look into it more deeply. When looking for a definition I found a few. 'Showing signs of ageing, but still powering forward with life." I'm on-board with this one, ageing is no reason to not live your life. 'Looking old, but embracing it' I am on board with the sentiment of embracing yourself however, nothing is that black and white and wanting to enhance your appearance for you own confidence is not something that is at odds with that. Another one I found was 'looking fantastic and healthy for your age without the help of dermal fillers, Botox or plastic surgery' I mean what!?!? So what happened to a women being given the right to choose what she does without prejudice or judgement! Where is the line drawn? Dermal filler and Botox not acceptable; how about make up, hair dye - hang on there madam... Does the moisturiser that you're using state it has antiageing properties? 'yes!' put it down now, in fear of growing old disgracefully! Are we when we hit middle age to be given a bar of soap and a smock and have to give up enjoying looking attractive for anyone including ourselves? I don't think so! I think the Amish have a strong look but is it for me - sorry - no! I don't want to leave the house without mascara because having blond eyelashes makes me look tired and I don't like it and I feel less confident like that. This also goes for crows feet, of which I have many, do I like them no! Can I do something about them yes! How about other aesthetic treatments; skin peels, microneedling, facials with eye of newt and extract of fore skin (one of these is real by the way, I haven't made it up in a fit of comedy genius! A clue is the aesthetic practitioner with a doggy bag at a bar mitzvah!). Is it different if a beautician or spa delivers these treatments not a medical aesthetic practitioner? If so why? I have a friend who looks unfavourably at what I do as its about people not growing old gracefully but she also spends a small fortune (large fortune actually but I'm not supposed to tell her husband!) on face creams and facials and I'm not for one second knocking it because that is what she likes to do. I do however feel frustrated by the double standard. The creams and facials are in a bid to improve the appearance and leads us back round to the question of what is growing old gracefully? Using the term graceful suggests that by having a treatment that some viewed as crossing the line (I would love to know where the line is so I could destroy it along with it's friend the 'double standard') makes you disgraceful! Is that really the case? No of course not! The bottom line has to be that we should respect each others choices and support our 'sisters' in what makes them feel more confident and armed to face 'their' world. I have Botox.....and the effect makes me feel more confident to smile, so instead of not having it and trying not smile with my eyes as the crows feet make me self conscious (which they did for years) I have a few injections and I'm not ashamed of that and I'm not ashamed that I wear mascara either, should I be? Someone once actually said to me about being fake, ummm 'you were not born with bright red hair and pink lips my friend' - did I say that no, why because I would feel that was rude but they didn't and it was because of my old friend the invisible line that I crossed. Whether that is covering grey hair with dye, using fabulous skin care products in attempt to turn back the clock, having collagen induction therapy to reduce scarring from teenage acne, wrinkle relaxing injections for the deep line that has developed between the eye brows which is the only thing you see when you look in the mirror or skin peels to treat the dark sun spots you have as a result of years of not understanding the damage the sun could do...lets all grow old with confidence and be as disgraceful as we like and enjoy every minute, because each one is a gift. Do what makes you happy!

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